Relationship Status: It's Complicated.

I grew up a Cubs fan. My whole family is Cubs fans. Some of my earliest memories are going to Wrigley and sitting on my dad’s lap and napping through the middle part of the game. Jody Davis, Jamie Moyer, Ryno and Mark Grace were my early favorites. 

 My grandma relocated to Florida. She sat at her dining room table everyday chain smoking Kools and drinking Old Style while spending time with Harry and Steve on the Superstation.

I lived and died with the Boys of Zimmer in ’89 and even now, still cringe when see or hear the name Will Clark.

There were some dark days after that, but Ty Griffin or was it Gary Scott or was it Earl Cunningham or Corey Patterson were going to be along soon to save the franchise. Gary Scott – remember him? I waited in line at the Ol’ Ballpark in Orland Park for an autograph for hours.

Over time my frustration began to grow. The team kept losing. Ownership refused to spend money. Fans were more Wrigley Field fans than actual Cubs fans. I started to contend if the Cubs and White Sox switch stadiums most people wouldn’t know it. Then Mark Prior came along and I was all in on him. My man crush was out of control. We all know how that turned out.

2003 was tough but my fandom remained strong. Then one day in in 2006 I was watching ‘Baseball Tonight’ when they flashed the NL Central standings. The Cubs were behind the Brewers, which was unacceptable. In that moment I decided the Cubs were never going to win the World Series and pledged my allegiance to the New York American League Baseball Club.

I cannot lie it has been an absolute blast watching them struggle year after year. I have laughed and I have laughed. But they’ve been doing the right things. They spent money to bring in Theo and Jed, starting tearing down Wrigley and hired Joe Maddon.

Still there is no part of me that wants to see them win. Though sometimes I think of people like Bobby, Shawn, Debbie and the host of other long suffering Cubs fans. Wouldn’t it be nice for them if they won?

Then there are the Cardinals – Yuck. Really the whole organization is so gross and smug. Tony La Russa, the Cardinal Way, the ‘aww shucks’ Midwestern ‘Best Fans in Baseball,’ the weird amount of worship for Yadi – it all makes me want to throw up. Very few things provide me with more joy than disliking this organization.

Oddly enough I have an inordinate amount of Cardinal fans in my life, and, despite their fandom, they are some of the best people you could ever know. I mean the two guys who stood up in my wedding and the pastor who did the ceremony are Cardinal fans. But I certainly don’t want to see this team win again.

So what’s the best case scenario for Cynical Keith? The Cubs win the series so the Cardinal fans have to live with that, and then the Cubs lose in the next round to magnify the disappointment of getting so close.